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Padraig


The Symptoms Of

Feline Afflictions!
The Impressionable Tigger 'n' Poo Bear

Feline Afflictions! - 1  Feline Afflictions! - 3


There is more "cat" furniture in the living room than your own furniture.

Your bed is scratched to bits, falling to pieces and generally wrecked but your cats have the newest and the best cat beds around.

BUT...

You sleep hunched up in a most unnatural position and can scarcely sleep for fear of knocking one of the little darlings off your bed!

You have a picture of your cat on your office desk and in your wallet/purse and/or in your locket.

There are more pictures of your cats on the wall than of your family.

You know your vet's telephone number by heart but have trouble remembering your family's and friends' numbers.

You win a family portrait in a competition and have one done of the cats.

Your visitors sit on the floor as you cannot possibly disturb your little darlings from their comfortable sleep on the settee, chairs etc.

You NEVER admit how many cats you have (except to other "cat people"). - From Carol at South Ribble Pet Cat Club, UK


This is from Husband John (Alias Loopy Lewis). I am posting it because he asked me to and I am an ever dutiful wife, but I would like to publicly disassociate myself from the contents.

The average dementia of feline domesticus from nose to tail tip is 32 inches, including tail, by 12 inches high. He trusts that will be of some assistance in the current research. (He is quite mad, you know!) If the cat concerned still has its 9 lives in fact this can be multiplied by 9. (See what I mean by"quite mad!"?) - From June


Cat names have to pass the idiot test!

How to test? You stand in the backyard and yell the new name at the top of your lungs three times. Then if you do not feel a total idiot, the name has passed the idiot test.

The cat entertainment budget, of course, is bigger than the people entertainment budget. But that's okay as the cats are the entertainment for the people. - From Irene


You do a little song and dance number to entertain your cats.

You take them for walks and can't think why other people are so surprised.

You smile and politely say "good morning" to other people's cats as you pass - and they say "good morning" back. - From Sandra

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